The Men From The Boys: The Meaning Of The “Art” In Pick-Up

I’ve seen the good PUAs in the field. I know what a good pick-up looks like. And, I know that most guys cannot do it.

There is a difference between meeting girls, and being a Pick-Up Artist. Most of you know how to meet girls, but you don’t “get” the art of attracting them.

Listen, anyone can learn to approach a girl – and, frankly, you SHOULD learn that. There is countless technology out there designed to help you do JUST THAT (my Natural Art of the Pick-Up being only one). I have witnessed MANY workshops with guys who coach others on the pick-up arts, and only a few can coach them on the true ART of this.

Most of what is happening is teachers showing guys how to APPROACH women. This is fine, but they cannot be called pick-up artists nor do they enjoy the level of success, power and choice reserved for the few who “get” the art involved.

So, what the hell is the art then?

Simple – the ability to attract a woman to you when she isn’t initially attracted to you. This is when you open the conversation (engage, as I say) and she is any form of the following:

dismissive
gruff
distant
“courteous”
irritated
etc

If you’ve ever wondered why the “best” PU coaches out there are also good-looking it’s because most of them cannot do this. They truly thrive on looks alone, merely steering the conversation towards escalation, never creating and building attraction and interest because it was already there.

So, the “art” of the pick-up lies in the attraction of the woman. This is highly necessary when she resists you from the outset. Then, and only then, do you need the skills of an artist.

Now, there is a huge difference between a “shit-test” and downright disinterest. A “shit-test” is an IOI, as you have flipped a number of switches, but given her nature, personality and background, she decides to test if you are truly worthy of her interest. Clearly, this is a GOOD thing.

The ability to pass shit-tests is fairly basic in my book, and should be done 80% of the time minimum, as she is already interested in you – she simply demonstrates that in a high-value way, to see what you are made of.

The true “art” comes into play when she turns her back to you, blows you off, courteously listens to you and then dismisses you (my favorite), and otherwise demonstrates TRUE disinterest in you. SHE IS NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU (in other words…sorry for yelling).

This is when the “art” is necessary. What do you do then? You got involved in “this stuff” to get the best women didn’t you? You saw her and approached you and now she shows you she is not interested. What then? Do you just walk away, having given up? Or, do you use actual skill to attract her into your world.

I viewed a video recently of Cajun TenMagnet…seems like a cool enough guy. This is not intended as a flame of him by any means, just citing a good example. On YouTube there is a video of when he wins the Keys to the VIP show (you can find it easily enough). He runs a set with a girl which follows the average form I indicate here. She was initially interested in him, and he simply, skillfully steered the conversation towards a #close. It was well done, and he managed the #close resistance at the end very well.

BUT, this was not art. No. (I have a hunch that he CAN turn a conversation towards attraction, but it wasn’t necessary here). What you see in that video though is what USUALLY happens. The guy had the balls to approach (kudos certainly), she was attracted to him initially, he steers it skillfully (aka, without supplication) towards a close of some sort. Often, this is what happens, and Cajun here does a fine job of it. Bravo to him for even being on that show…that gets him the steel balls award of the year in my book.

A man who can do this is a true artist. Otherwise, like most, he is able to approach, and then just takes those women who are open to his approach and find him initially attractive. An artist he is not. This Is The Norm.

Now, the nice thing about Project Hollywood (one of the few) was that the wheat was separated from the chaff. There was a group of us there who were good, and who could assess the abilities of the others. We all knew who was an artist, and who was an approacher – and there were very few artists. We were vetted by each other, and we were helped by each other to raise our abilities. There was no hiding behind a chat board, website, or even a blog. We could watch each other, and could witness first-hand the artists vs the approachers.

Nowadays, that isn’t possible – which is precisely why we have so many companies out there coaching guys…and very few social artists. I do believe coaching guys on approaching women is a GREAT skill to focus on, and is probably as far as most students will get anyway – as the ability to pass thru the threshold into mastering the “art” takes tremendous, tremendous effort.

Thoughts? Comments? Flames?

Let em rip.

Sn.
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