That looks interesting. Nothing wrong with a pre-planned date which looks spontaneous. As long as it’s fun. The idea here is to see if she is someone I might want to spend more time with, so having something standard initially – since you don’t really know each other – makes perfect sense. Once you DO get to know her, this should obviously factor into what you decide to do – right?

Here’s a question – how do you get her to come to your place from the get-go? Do you do the David D trick? Do you know of that? It is pretty killer if you don’t. Here it is:

Have her come by your place, and tell her to buzz your apt when she arrives. Then, instead of just coming downstairs to meet her, buzz her up – without saying anything over the intercom. She comes up to your place, and you then “put on the finishing touches” as she gets to see your home (which is hopefully cool and neat etc.), maybe you show her a pic of you and your mom or something.

Next, you LEAVE the apartment/home with her – this helps her feel comfort, as you didn’t ‘try’ anything when you had her there. Also, for whenever it is appropriate, it will be less of an unknown for her to go back to your place to spend quality time.

A GREAT idea here, credited to David D…

Thanks Matt – would love to know how you approach that.

SN.

I really liked your idea for The Frying Pan over in Chelsea. I have yet to do it.

I try usually to have a low-key date that seems more spontaneous than planned out (EVEN THOUGH IT IS PLANNED OUT!!). I don’t know if this is good or not, but I seem to enjoy it more.

I get her to meet me at my place, I stay in there a few minutes then mosey on down to get some hot drink, or cold (depending on weather) then carry that around with us, and walk throughout the city. I usually pick a trendier neighborhood to do this in. Once we start getting tired, I find a nice park nearby and chat. Then, if we’ve both had some fun on the date, I invite her out to something energetic during the day time (this helps her to feel that I like her more than just a bootycall!X!)

That date is usually bike-riding and taking photos as we do it, and then a cold beverage after.

Thanks Steve,
Matt

One of my faves is to take her to a gallery opening, and then to Billy’s in Chelsea here in NYC. We grab some cupcakes/coffee and take to the west side park to stroll and sit on the park benches and watch the sunset. This is perfect for a Sunday afternoon, in the warmer months. And a low $$ outlay as galleries tend to be free.

Carlos

PS – we met at your essentials program…which rocked big time.